The rambling thoughts of a Modern Orthodox Chassid (whatever that means). Contact me at emansouth @

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

"Mommy Doesn't Let"

I took The Vance to Manhattan today to see Cirque de Sollel. We went for pizza before the performance. I bought a Dr. Pepper along with my slice (I don't usually drink soda but I am still trying to gain a couple of pounds so I drink the stuff from time to time). The Vance didn't want anything to drink but I took an extra cup expecting her to change her mind.

When I offered her some of my soda she said, "Mommy doesn't let".

This is true; except for Shabbos (and then only when we have guests) soda is never made available. I was impressed with the Vance's self control but more so with MHW's mastery of motherhood. Without being preachy or loud, MHW has somehow constructed a paradigm where rules are rules and her word is the law. Kids crave structure and MHW gives it to them in a firm but gentle way (how is that possible?).

(And, as an aside, if regular kids crave structure, how much more so foster kids. Which is what makes MHW a spectacular foster mom).

I am not worthy.

Really. I'm not.

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  • At 11:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I truly admire what you've done for this child.

    But why must you utilize the term vance?

  • At 12:04 PM, Blogger ThePeoplesChamp said…

    You should run a school. I can use it from time to time :)

  • At 1:11 PM, Anonymous Jeremy said…

    Maybe a guest post when she gets back? Let us all know how to do it?

  • At 5:26 PM, Blogger MoChassid said…


    My mom called me The Vance so I'm calling The Vance the Vance. It's a term of endearment. Maybe when she gets a little older she will graduate to OYD.

  • At 8:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Just to nitpick on an otherwise perfect situation - I hope I don't offend:

    My children also use the verb "let", meaning "allow", without an object. I did not grow up in a frummie community and I learned to say, as a small kid, "Mommy doesn't let ME." Now my daughters are older I correct them constantly. It isn't only the word "let." When my 13 year old says "by recess we did this" or "by lunchtime we did that" I let her know in no uncertain terms that she isn't to speak like an immigrant, and that if she says "by" in the Yiddish construct at a college interview, she will be going to community college.

    Am I being too harsh on them?

  • At 9:31 AM, Blogger MoChassid said…


    No argument from me. I drive my kids nuts correcting their English. And the Yiddishisms also make me crazy.


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