Playing Ball With Rebbes, Class Trips and Other Horrible Things

I wasn't at the TU conference and I didn't hear what was said or not about playing ball, class trips or abuse.

To the extent gedolim said things that we can't understand, I attribute it to their exististing in a different reality from us, by us meaning those not in the Israeli Ultra-Orthodox world.

For what it's worth (not much), this is what I think:

Child Abuse: The machers at the TU conference should have gotten up and said, mefurash, that TU has a zero tolerance policy and that we will examine strategies for policing and reporting it. It should have been said clearly and forcefully. Period, end of story. Ain Mah L'daber.

Class Trips: I just sent OYD on her class trip to Washington. As a graduating 8th grader, the alternative to taking this trip is wasting yet another two beautiful May days in class with nothing at stake, simply waiting for the year to end. Instead, she will have two wonderful days with her friends, in her case a last opportunity to hang with her classmates since she will be attending a different high school next year. I have to admit, I just don't get what's wrong with this.

Playing Ball With Rebbes: It is pashut that it is increasingly more difficult for teachers to relate to teenaged boys, especially in the MO world. There are way too many things pulling them in different directions. If a Rebbe can shoot some hoops with the boys during recess or discuss the latest Yankees game, his stature goes up in their eyes, not down. We are simply not holding by yiras haRebbe so we have to find what works. (It is so difficult to understand what was allegedly said at the TU conference because this is so pashut in our circles.)

(Let me go further. What about the girls? In my experience (2 daughters), it seems that morot who dress fashionably or seem to be 'in touch' also have a much better chance at relating to their students than teachers who are remote or out of touch. That's another one that isn't too difficult to understand.)

Bottom Line: In the chareidi educational circles there is way too much emphasis on Sur Mai Rah and not nearly enough on Asei Tov. There is an overwhelming fear of the outside world but not enough confidence in the beauty of Torah and Yiddishkeit. Consequently, we hear about restriction after restriction rather than discussions about inspiring our children. This is tragic.

More about this later.