The rambling thoughts of a Modern Orthodox Chassid (whatever that means). Contact me at emansouth @

Monday, August 13, 2007

Burger's Bar Rules

In my never ending quest to save mankind from itself, and based on my keen powers of observation, I offer the following tips to anyone who decides to eat at the Cedarhurst branch of Burger's Bar:

1. Since you generally have to wait at least 5 minutes until you get to order, and since the menu posted on the wall is literally staring you in the face, please know what you are going to order when your turn comes up. Starting to think about your order only when you reach the cash register is not helpful.

2. If your receipt is number 106 and they have just called 62, please stay away from the counter; if you do the math, you'll realize there are about 44 people ahead of you.

3. When number 106 does finally come up, please know what dressings and fixings you are going to have put on your order. All the dressings are also listed on the wall menu.

Perhaps if everyone followed MoC's simple rules, it would take less than 45 minutes to get a burger.



  • At 1:12 AM, Blogger PsycleSteve said…

    Please explain to me how you eat greasy fried fast food and still weigh less than 130? I've gotten down to ~155 (was 185 a couple of years ago prior to cycling) and am finding tooth marks on my bedpost when I wake up each morning.

  • At 9:03 AM, Blogger MoChassid said…


    The truth is that I very rarely eat greasy fried fast food. MHW is an extremely health conscious and low fat cook so most of what I eat at home is not fattening. Second, I'm not a huge eater. If I have a business lunch, I always eat fish and then a very light dinner. I'm also a big soup guy. Soup is high in mass but generally low in calories. I also work out hard at least five days a week and walk to and from work, about 17 minutes each way every single day.

    And, I guess I have a freaky metabolism.

    Besides, your 155 is probably equivalent to my 130, lbs. per inch. I just don't like bed posts.

  • At 10:17 AM, Anonymous dave said…

    On a related point, when you are at the supermarket at the checkout line, and they are bagging your stuff, that means it's time to start thinking about paying. I love these people who watch the lady check everything out, press the 'Total' key, and only then start thinking about getting out their purse. Now the purse besides containing their wallet, contains everything they'll need if they were going on a 10 day trip in the wilderness. They finally find their wallet, and then it has to be exact change...Grrrrrgh


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